Sunday, September 30, 2007

The Stillness of the Peace of God

I just want to say a quick Hi to you. I love you.

I have been quiet busy these days and I feel something profound changing in me and I can't put my finger on it ( Thank God!). So I just sit back and let myself be changed.
Like I read the other day in an essay from Joel Goldsmith: Any perceived problem or conflict is just the Christ in you ascending and your resistance against that, is usually experienced as conflict. So big deal. I let the Christ win. There is nothing else going on anyway.

Today we have been busy as hell at the Cheese Factory Restaurant, where I serve as a cook. I am soo grateful for todays lesson: The Stillness of the Peace of God abides in me. Especially in those seemingly busy or demanding moments the lessons come along as this sanctuary and holy instant, where I can stay unaffected by the world, breathing the fresh air of freedom and joy.

Well... and now at the end of the day knowing you are with me is everything: Thank you.

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Wednesday, September 26, 2007

You can have a miracle NOW!

This my friend Lisa...isn't she gorgeous?

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Tuesday, September 25, 2007

Direct Contact with God Is Natural

I love this:

Sunday, September 23, 2007

If I Defend Myself I Am Attacked

Today I experienced so many things--- I don't know, if I am able to bring them all together to share. Probably not-I am having a real short term memory. Oh, well...

One thing was: I just stop trying to proof anything to you. In fact you are completely perfect and lovable exactly as you are right now. If you see a problem, I will share my vision with you, knowing that our ultimate goal is shared: we want to be happy and we can leave space and time together right now. In this holy instant.

So sometimes I come across a guy that wants to argue with me. I love it. So the experiment is to agree with him completely. Yes. You are right. Yes, absolutely.

I don't want to defend ANY idea about myself.

The funny thing though is that there is always such a conversion point in that. There seems always a moment of openness that follows and THAT'S what I am looking for. It feels somehow like forgiveness, like I included you in with myself. Like, everything is getting adjusted to this call for God that is ALL-WAYS going on.

The only thing that CAN be shared is truth. So how can we know what is true?

I think: if it brings JOY to us and everyone in the universe seen or unseen. But it does not matter how it looks today, because: "A happy outcome to ALL things is sure." I don't want to be the judge of anything anymore.

Does this make any sense at all?
I love you with all my heart and liver:)

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Saturday, September 22, 2007

You Are Holy

Thursday, September 20, 2007

Open Out a Way

Since there seems to be a sense of separation between the Father and us, and between all those who are to play a part in our life’s experience, our work is to realize our oneness with the Father, the one consciousness, and then we automatically become one with every spiritual being. There is but one consciousness, and that consciousness, functioning as your consciousness and as mine, is the connecting link between you and your world and me and my world, establishing us in oneness with all those who are a part of our fulfillment.

Unless we wish to engage in a daily battle of competition, a daily battle of trying to work with persons antagonistic to our ideas, unless we wish to take our chance with whether we will have the right employer or right employee, or whether we will deal with those who are the right people for us or the wrong – unless we wish to do that, we must establish firmly our oneness with the Father before we leave our home in the morning to embark upon any enterprise, commercial, social, or ministerial, realizing that the consciousness of the Father, which is our consciousness, is the consciousness of every individual. Therefore, all those ready for the experience of association with us, by the attraction of that consciousness, are brought to us, and in the same way, we are led to everyone we can serve or bless.

By Joel Goldsmith

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Wednesday, September 19, 2007

Healing Yourself

Are you ready to be healed?

Healing is a natural occurrence through simply listening to the Voice for God. The Voice for God is in everything - it could be, listening to the needs of your brother (the guy next to you), being ready to serve or making tea. It is an action of mind. And this can be practiced. That's what the Course in Miracles taught me.

Today a dear brother came up to me, thanking me for a revelation he had while I was standing with him in our light meditation at the academy. I am deeply grateful to him as well. "You are a real healer" he said. I laughed.

We both knew that whatever happened there, had nothing to do with me. It was brought about through the simple joining of minds and complete surrender to Gods will( --I will be wrong with this description too, but this is what I come up with to find words for something that is completely miraculous and not conceptual).

Joining without fear in love. Pure extension. I LOVE IT!! You stay available for God and all that is happening around you is healing, because you are going home to God. My function is forgiveness. I remember having this thought while I was standing with this brother: "Give me your burden."- And that thought was just given me- it also had nothing to do with me. Everything is pure grace.

You start to be moved by God instead of moving yourself through self will coming from judgments made in the past.

So much more happened, that I can't even describe here, but maybe it can be summed up this way:


Blessings, Lily.

PS: If you like the image as your desktop? Contact me and I'll send you a bigger file.

Tuesday, September 18, 2007


Being awake is being your self as god created you. It has NOTHING to do what you are thinking about yourself now, or remembered or anticipated. It is merely a recognition, NOT a process in time.
A friend called me the yesterday saying that there are still things that he desires in this world. He can't live without sex or affection.
Neither do I-I just want more...Being with God is pure intimacy and the joy that I experience is so beyond any imagination. Finally I began to realize that I have only ONE relationship and that is with God. As soon as I knew that, all relationships became a reflection of this ONE relationship. And it has zero to do with bodies.

I had to chuckle a bit, because everyone seems to think a "spiritual life" will demand sacrifices. And I remember having these thoughts myself.

Wanting to be with God only needs one single decision and my dedication to it in any situation. I NEED do nothing. Everything from then on is an UNlearning or an UNdoing. Because I am already. Nothing needs to be changed. Everything that I need is given me. Without demanding what that will look like tomorrow.

That is my freedom and yours.
I love you so very much, Lily.

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Sunday, September 16, 2007

You are mind-Purely mind.

This is a little video that was spontaneously taken a while ago. Of course I am having trouble looking at myself and think there would be a 1000 ways to make it better.

I choose not to care about that.

Funny is this: when I first watched it, I almost died in self judgment, but simultaneous to all that crap I felt this energy surging through me and I was thinking: Oh my God, I am really healing myself. It is not about self concept but the acceptance of something bigger then me.

So, here we go...

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Saturday, September 15, 2007

You're living in a mirror glas ball:)

Today I was reminded of a revelatory vision that was given to me in the beginning of my awakening, when I asked :

(The story is in fact a bit longer- I,m just giving you the short version of it)

So, in this vision I saw just my head stuck in this ball mirrored from the inside.
I knew it was me- or better the way I was looking at things. I would think a thought and it would be reflected back to me immediately.
But, I would not recognize it as my creation I would respond to it as if it wasn't in my head but outside in a vast world with people and things I could respond to, forgetting that I put them out there.

I also did not recognize the immediacy of cause and effect, -the experience seemed to be spread out in time and I saw myself as a victim of a world that I wasn't able to control. Man, how fucked up can you get? Of course I would feel separate and victimized...duh?

There I saw for the first time how little I am, how small my world and that I am in fact going nowhere- no purpose, no nothing.

I HAVE TO GET OUT! I cried out---Yes! And I had been given the means with A Course In Miracles to do this to: WAKE UP. Oh, guaranteed: there is nothing more fun as the adventure of taking full responsibility for EVERYTHING that occurs.-Yeah, baby.

Following sections are out of the Course. AWESOME!

"Projection makes perception, and you cannot see beyond it. Again and again have you attacked your brother, because you saw in him a shadow figure in your private world. And thus it is you must attack yourself first, for what you attack is not in others. Its only reality is in your own mind, and by attacking others you are literally attacking what is not there."

"Projection makes perception. The world you see is what you gave it, nothing more than that. But though it is no more than that, it is not less. Therefore, to you it is important. It is the witness to your state of mind, the outside picture of an inward condition. As a man thinketh, so does he perceive. Therefore, seek not to change the world, but choose to change your mind about the world. Perception is a result and not a cause. And that is why order of difficulty in miracles is meaningless. Everything looked upon with vision is healed and holy. Nothing perceived without it means anything. And where there is no meaning, there is chaos."

Love ya-mean it.

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Friday, September 14, 2007

Who am I again?

Well. today I was sitting in class...thinking.

By the way: I am so happy and fortunate spend every morning at Endeavor Academy with the most incredible teacher ever: The Master Teacher. He is just so fun and pulls the rug right from underneath me. THANK GOD-I AM SO GRATEFUL. I don't want to get caught up in the past anymore.
I get up in the morning and here I am: hey, I have to get up, I got to take a shower, get dressed, make some tea and so on...I really take everything for granted-the bed, my hand, my reflection in the mirror and it feels sooo good to be eliminated. In a good sense. Why would I hold on to any belief about myself?-Its going to be proven wrong any minute anyway.
So, well. today I was sitting in class...thinking: I don't think I can be of any worth for anyone. First of all I am boring and second, who would want to use me for really important stuff I am just this complete moron fucking everything up that comes my way...and so on. Anyone familiar with this?
So, I don't know what to do, but I know this now is really getting nowhere. So, I turn to Jesus in my mind and look at him and let him judge me. He just gives me this really BIG grin and doesn't say a thing. I laugh out loud and remember that I just was caught up in time trying to make my own little world of misery and pain real. I am dead than really, or some of you would say not dead yet, but getting there fast. OOOh, well.
Thank God, I know what my job is: STOP figuring anything out. Just let it be changed for me and rest in God.
I love each and everyone of you!

Wednesday, September 12, 2007

Let IT change baby!

It's so great: I feel a change is taking shape and I am here watching it change-I'm loving it. It will all unfold perfectly. I want to share all what I love in life with you. It is my joy to share.
I love God, I love Jesus, I love the Course in Miracles,
I love creative action with God, I love painting, I love poems,
I love to create my clothes, I love to heal my mind, I love colors, I love good design,
I love fashion, I love the truth, I love you, I love to get out of time.
Until now I still was afraid to just be happy and share everything, because I had a judgment about what is more with God and what isn't. I knew reasonable that that could not be true--but I was afraid to be judged. Isn't that funny...Judgment is only happening in me -it is not out there. What a relief! So, since God is always with me, God is in EVERYTHING I see or do, in EVERY action out of LOVE. It does not not need any justification, it just is.
God created you unique. You were picked for a very specific job that ONLY you can do. There is no way you could continue to compare yourself. What makes you happy? Go do it!
What I find is that I do not look for happiness in this world at all. Everything seems to be given me by God--I just stopped to question His ways just stop to sort it out, because I can't. I cannot judge simply, because I have NO GROUNDS on which to judge anything. What a relief!
EVERYTHING is a Miracle! EVERYTHING! Your judgment or belief about it is completely meaningless. Give away your meaning and love what is.

Let all things be exactly as they are.

Let me not be Your critic, Lord, today, and judge against You. Let me not attempt to interfere with Your creation, and distort it into sickly forms. Let me be willing to withdraw my wishes from its unity, and thus to let it be as You created it. For thus will I be able, too, to recognize my Self as You created me. In Love was I created, and in Love will I remain forever. What can frighten me, when I let all things be exactly as they are? Lesson 268

PS: The picture I made in Photoshop as my desktop background. Mail me if you like to have it and I send you a bigger size...

Tuesday, September 11, 2007


9/11 appears in a lot of minds as a terrible, tragic day.

It is quite amazing how we cling to the past and believes connected to them and also the decision to give them a certain meaning.
I remember that I couldn't believe what i saw on TV that day and I thought I was very shocked and confused. I was in Berlin at the time on a shopping street and overheard guys talking about it. One of them said: "This means war" --I did not know what he was talking about, till I got to my friends place where it was the first thing that was shown on TV.
I also remember looking within and saying: "Above all else I want to see" and "Above all else I want to see THINGS differently". What occurred was this: I saw a big column of Light arising from just that very same spot where the towers stood. There was something profound happening that I could not know what the meaning was, but I knew: all is right.
Later I decided to join with our Healing Center Station in NY and went to see the place myself and offer my help. Everyone I met on the streets seemed very open and loving and when I got to the site where the planes crashed, I felt more then I saw: this immense energy that would arise straight into the heavens. The reassurance came into my mind quickly: --There is more going on then I think and understand right now AND it is good. There is only love.

Watch these videos with Byron Katie about how to turn around the fear of attackpart1 and part2

PS: 9/11 happens to be my friends birthday and the phone# we call in an emergency.
What picture do put with a post like that? I can't think of one...

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